Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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