the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
