Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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