how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
