i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
