I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
