I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
