Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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