If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
