He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
My ATM looks so different sober.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
