have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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