How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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