Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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