K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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