I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Please don't give away my fajitas
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
