The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
A+ Viking dick
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize