i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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