Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
He felt like a one man threesome
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize