I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
