As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
