So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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