Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
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