hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
