The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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