I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize