My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
