i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
