I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
