3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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