Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
