I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
