how do flat chested girls get laid?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
