I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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