I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
