i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize
