Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
