Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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