Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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