He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
