Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
