Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
