I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
