You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
