He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
