This girl is more easily done than said...
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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