Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
