Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Someone came in the potted fern
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
