No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Randomize
