the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
