she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
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